The Reasons you should hire me
Dear Reader,
Thank you for being here and taking the time to read my words. I’m guessing this article is particularly appealing to you because you are considering contacting me for my services. I will try to make it interesting. Here you’ll get to see me through the lenses of my greatest cheerleaders: my grandmothers. I had a strong connection with my grandparents. Both my grandfathers died when I was young. My mother’s father I remember most. I was 19 when he passed. I had some good years with him. The impact he made on my life was simple: find a man who loves you, for you. He adored my grandmother. Apparently, my father’s father followed the same script. Both my grandmothers lived into their 90s, so I was gifted with their presence as I grew into a woman. They both attended my wedding and were alive to see me into motherhood. I think of them most days and remember the life they lived and the profound effect they have on me. I often speak of them to my clients because most of what I know, I learned from them. I think this is why I find myself wanting to do the work that I do. I also think this is why I miss the good old days. Here are the key notes I’ve taken from each of them.
Florence De Pauli (Edwards) - Maternal grandmother. Born: 8/25/1921
Florence grew up in Terryville, Connecticut. She wasn’t poor, but she wasn’t rich. Her father was a locksmith and her mother a homemaker and churchgoer. She had a sister. She always told me her sister was much fatter than her and said it with pride. Her favorite place to visit was Cape Cod. Not much more there on her end. At least that’s all she shared with me. Florence wasn’t much of a storyteller. What she was, in my opinion, is a legend. When she had enough of the small-town life, more so, the small-town men, she joined the Marines and followed this path until she arrived in San Francisco. Later in life, she would have to deal with a severely mentally ill son. Taking the lead on both of these unexplored societal challenges was no small feat for my grandmother. She spoke with authority when it was time to make something happen. Yet she was a woman born in a time when few of “her” kind wore this hat. She joined the Marines and then eventually became a wife and mother, reluctantly but nonetheless served her time. Her greatest role, in my opinion, was her role as a grandmother, and not because she was loving and kind, but because she saw a legacy in me, one where she could tell me the truth and live on through me. She trusted me to actually love her, for her. The key notes gained while being her granddaughter are:
Be brave even if you’re not.
Don’t let society tell you how to act, be unique and stand out.
And lastly, you’re not just what your roles say you are. You are much more and always changeable.
Lorna West (Krueter)- Paternal grandmother. Born: 4/19/1922
Lorna grew up in the Outer Richmond district of San Francisco. Unlike Florence, Lorna loved talking about her childhood. She grew up as the youngest child of a huge family. I know she was the 16th birth, but because of the times, many did not survive. She still managed to have 9 older brothers and her dear sister Louis; her eldest sister died during the Spanish flu outbreak in San Francisco. I grew up listening to my grandmother speak of her adventures in life as a child, a young mother and wife to a soldier, and a grandmother. Lorna wore all her “hats” with pride and enthusiasm. The stories are endless, and I can’t wait to share them in my future blogs. One of my greatest lessons from Lorna is a quote she shared many times with me and wrote as an opening quote in her autobiography:
Definition of Success
To laugh often and much.
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children.
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
When I reminisce on this quote that she spoke to all of us grandkids often, I can see how it molded us. I walk in the footsteps of my grandmother as a wife, a mother, and a San Francisco resident. I have wondered why she didn’t include the quote in its entirety and, in fact, changed its title. Here’s the actual quote:
What is success?
To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded!
Ralph Waldo Emerson
But this was my grandmother. She would do anything to make us believe in ourselves, even if that meant changing the title of a famous quote and leaving out pieces. She, in my opinion, was magical. Her commitment to family, traditions, and conservatism structured my core values. She taught me that nothing is more important than family. But that family isn’t defined by blood, it is found in the nature of our characters and who we choose to support. She was my greatest fan. The key notes while being her granddaughter are:
You are one person in a giant world of people, so show off your talents; be big and gregarious.
No matter what happens, love.
And finally, tell your story to whoever will listen.
You can imagine having these two influential women in my life has created someone strong and capable. I am that. I am understanding and caring. I love a good story and a strong character. I find peace in helping and supporting people. So maybe this helps you decide whether to hire me or maybe it doesn’t. Either way, I hope you enjoyed the reading.
Signing off today with love and hope,
Melissa Le Biavant